I wonder…

Dear internet,

I’m starting to wonder if my brother Ben is as bad a judge of character as I was in grade 8. He just had like- uh, I don’t know, 5 or 20 people over today, they all start looking the same after a while…

But, yeah, I’m questioning his choice in friends. I’ll start with the boys – is there some kind of prepubescent male hive mind I’m not aware of? I mean, seriously, they all dress exactly the same way – long shirts to cover up the fact that their jeans are down to their knees, skater shoes, those ridiculous hats with the straight rims so they can be worn in that wangster (wannabe/white gangster, I dunno, I’ve heard both) style. But there are some things ridiculously creepy about some of his friends that set them apart from other prepubescent boys I remember when I was his age (well some of them might have been like this, but I was smart enough to avoid them >.>).

So once, my mom was doing the laundry, right? And she always checks the pockets of people’s pants before throwing them in the machine just in case there’s a cellphone, iPod, money or something else important in there, right? Well, she was checking Ben’s pockets and stumbled across one of Ben’s friends’ homework from music class which for some reason Ben had… and so, curious, my mom unfolded it to find out what it was, right?

Well well well, wait did she find on the back of this sheet? A doodle of a penis orgasming (I know that’s not a word, it just sounds so much less vulgar than the word that sounds like “coming”) on Ms. Pacman.

Seriously, why on God’s earth would a THIRTEEN year-old kid be drawing these things? And why Ms. Pacman? -.- And Ben wasn’t surprised at it at all – heck, that wonderful art wasn’t even made by the kid I was expecting it would’ve been by, since apparently Ben skates with these 3 other kids I remember were kind of… well, those wannabe bad-boy kinds with behavioral issues.

And now for the girls Ben hangs out with. Two words: flaky airheads. Seriously, one of the girls that Ben sees at school EVERY DAY and probably was with him at the mall today came over today and as soon as she walked in, hugged him and was like “Oh, it’s been so long, I missed you!” in that over-dramatic way airheads behave.

Oh, and have I mentioned they all look the same? This isn’t me trying to be some annoying older sister here – he literally hangs out with girls who all look the same, the only way I can tell half of them apart is their hair colour, which doesn’t help much. They all wear ridiculous amounts of makeup, dress the exact same way (skinny jeans, hoodies or some kind of tight t-shirt, skate shoes even though they don’t skate), they’ve all got brown/blonde/brown dyed blond hair and they’re all really, really scrawny. It’s kind of hard not to see some kind of trend when all your little brothers’ 20-odd girlfriends look like they weigh less than 90 pounds… seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him hang out with a girl who looked even slightly overweight.

Oh God, please help these poor sheep find an ounce of uniqueness and personality so one day I may tell them apart.

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